Does this count as Porn?

I was looking around for model swords on google -- an activity that most geeks with weapon fixations love to pursue -- when I ran across something that is borderline awesome and something that is borderline pornographic.

Here's what happened.

When I surf, I usually tend to just right-click several items that turn up on Google off the bat, without even reading the description.

The first tab that opened led me to the awesome.

I ran into some company called honestdragonchina that is manufacturing a copy of the sword that Cloud used in Final Fantasy: Advent Children. Yes, we've all seen huge-ass sword remakes before, but what's cool about this one is that it seems to have copied the "assembly" function of the sword/sword-set that Cloud used in the movie.

So after appreciated the craftsmanship involved with such an expensive and complicated shelf display, and mourning over the fact that it's only made of high-grade wood and not some aluminum alloy, I hotkeyed alt-tab, and lo and behold:

Tell me, does this count as porn?

Quotable Quotes

In the recent edition of Official Playstation Magazine, Final Fantasy VII: Crisis Core director, Hajime Tabata answered questions regarding the direction of the much loved Final Fantasy VII franchise. Amusing that he wasn't asked much about Crisis Core specifically.

Anyhow, he said a few things that got fan-boys(and girls) wetting their pants:

"The possiblity for a remake may become greater if, for instance, the schedules of the original members of the Final Fantasy VII development team, such as Kitase and Nomura, open up"

Did you year that? He said they might do it.

So, for the sake of that hi-def FFVII that you've all been wanting to see, keep bombarding Kitase and Nomura with e-mails until FFXIII and Versus XIII goes gold ("going gold" is jargon for "done, finito, ready for selling). That way, they might consider pushing through with your little obsession.

Waiting sucks

Since Nickelodeon is incredibly delayed with their air-schedule of Book III of Avatar: The Last Airbender, and Canada's YTV -- our last hope for up-to-date Avatar -- decided to re-run Avatar from the start, we'll probably have to wait until mid March or early April to catch a new episode of Avatar.

The new title is rumored to be "The Boiling Rock" by the way, and it's said to be a two part shindig. Current popular speculation regarding the episode is that it's a "great escape" story, focusing on all the characters that have been captured by the Fire Nation so far. I'm thinking that most people supporting this theory just plain miss Suki. The other theory is that it's a firebendiny-avatary-element-mixing-training episode where Aang learns to bend lava.

Personally, I'm hoping it's a White Lotus episode. We seriously need a big reveal when it comes to that secret organization. I mean, come on, there's been enough teasing about it across so many episodes.

Yes, I like Iroh, the old fart. Sue me.

Anyhow, given the long and tiresome wait, I'm willing to bet that the next volume of Heroes will air earler than the new Avatar episode (NBC did promise march-ish). Who knows?

Damnit, this avatard is going through Avatar withdrawal and he doesn't like it.

Johnny: Reveillarking back and forth

Since it's been spoiled, people have been going gaga over the 4/3 flying elemental named Reveillark. Particularly because of Reveillark's very potent "when I leave play" ability.

With that in mind, do me a favor and imagine that you have a sacrifice outlet in the form of a suspended Greater Gargadon, a Nantuko Husk, or even a Mirror Entity that you intend to use to set your all your creature's power and toughness to zero. Got that in your head? Good.

Okay, now that you have those elements, check out the possible interactions that Reveillark has with either of the cards that are pictured below it.

Yes, you can go infinite with it.

As long as you can maintain a sacrifice outlet, you can endlessly recur a creature from your graveyard into play. This allows for Soul Wardens to gain you infinite life, for Mogg Fanatics to kill people for you, or for singleton Merrow Witsnipers to deck people. Nevermind the possibility of seeing a returning Martyr of Sands, a back-from-the-grave Mulldrifter, or a Venser gone mad.

Furthermore what's nice about the Reveillark combo is that it's flexible enough to allow you to take your deck in different directions.

Choosing Saffi as a Reveillark partner allows you to go either green/red/white or green/white/nlack. Red and green gives acces to burn, acceleration, and other ways to sacrifice your creatures - Thermopod for infinite mana anyone? Black, can help out in the tutoring and disruption department. It can also help with getting stuff from your hand to your graveyard. Who thought Oona's Prowler could be used primarily as a discard outlet instead of a 3/1 for 2 beater?

Body Double on the other hand, let's you bleed into counterspell/control territory - something that's always nice.

Surfing around the mtgsalvation forums, I ran across a list that somebody got from a Japanese tournament. The mix of 75 cards bellow supposedly managed to snag top 8.

Creatures:
4 Mulldrifter
4 Mirror Entity
4 Reveillark
4 Riftwing Cloudskate
3 Bonded Fetch
3 Body Double

Spells:
4 Prismatic Lens
1 Mind Stone
3 Condemn
3 Momentary Blink
4 Wrath of God

Land:
5 Island
4 Plains
4 Adarkar Wastes
4 Wanderwine Hub
3 Faerie Conclave
2 Calciform Pools
1 Urza's Factory

Sideboard:
2 Teferi, Mage of Zhalfir
2 Draining Whelk
2 Sower of Temptation
1 Stonecloaker
3 Teferi's Moat
1 Mystical Teachings
4 Flashfreeze

Amazingly, going the Body Double/Mirror Entity route seems to have simplified things given that you can stack so many copies Mirror Entity's ability with X=0.

All I'm waiting for now is for someone to experiment with a more aggresive Blue/Red/White version that uses the Elemental tribe for Smokebraider and Incandescent Soulstroke based acceleration, that has Elemental Harbinger to search for stuff, and Greater Gargadon for inevitability. Yes, it may not be efficient, but the point is, the combo is so open, that it can go that route. Amazingly, WoTC printed all the tools to do so.

And here people were complaining that combo was dead.

Anyhow, those too "Spikey" to bother trying to assemble the pieces to get the combo going, relax, Momentary Blink still loves Reveillark. You see, what's ultimately nice about Reveillark is that it doesn't have to go infinite to get you the win.

She said, she said

These women think that if you have a penis, are over 20, and are playing videogames, you are a man teen or a child-man. Yes, they have ways of coming up with funny names.

This other lady though, would have none of that. After all, what about all those humans with vaginas that are over 20 and love playing videogames? What are they? Just plain escapist?

Another case of she said, she said - when women argue over feminism. (Or at least, when it goes overboard. As the uppity bitch said, "Xboxes are toys afterall.")

Nostalgia Wins! Chrono Trigger sells for over 1K

An extremely collectible copy of the SNES classic, Chrono Trigger sold for over one thousand dollars over at eBay the other day.

Proof that there's a niche out there that present day RPGs aren't filling? You bet. Proof that there are a lot of geeks out there that earn way too much? Definitely. I mean, look at what this guy did with his Xbox 360 Elite:

See? Way too much resources, and of course, talent. If you can afford to spend over a thousand bucks on a game that can be played via easily accessible emulation software, you definitely can afford to jury-rig your $500 entertainment/game system.

Vorthos: Radha, Warrior Princess

I know the deck's been talked about for weeks now, and I'm well aware of the fact that every monkey and his uncle's been fiddling around a mix of 75 that contains Bramblewood Paragon, Obsidian Battle-Axe, and a random assortment of warriors/elves. However, I feel the urge to blog about the deck not because it is potentially competitive, or it's damned fun to play, I do so because of it's undeniable Vorthosian nature.

Yes, a deck that could be potentially competitive, and still full of vorthosian theme-love and geeky 90s TV references.

So, to jump straight into it, take a look at the deck-skeleton bellow:

Firstly, they're all women. Secondly, they're all warrior-women. Lastly, one of them is the Heir to Keld. If you're not hearing the Xena, Warrior Princess theme right now, think of this moment as my attempt at cuing the music for you.

[Ta dada ta dad a tum tamtamm...]

So, you've got Xena in the form of Radha. That's pretty much required, as Radha would likely be the only Legendary Creature in the Deck. Also, being a heir to Keld doesn't hurt either.

Gabrielle is probably any one of the three other warrior elf hotties -- probably the Paragon. Staff weapon? Check. Odd armor? Check. Lesbo aura? Double-check.

The remaining ladies could be counted as any number of numerous blade-weilding feminine fighters in the show. You know, those scantily clad ladies that often gang up on Xena and Gabrielle at the start of the show, and yet somehow end up on their side by the end of it? I mean, the ones that are there mainly to attract audience members with testosterone.

I'd like to go through Google right now and make a card to character comparison using a "Characters of Xena" fan-site that I might find. Just for the sake of Wren's Run Vanquisher and Imperious Perfect having character analogues and all that. However, doing so will probably make me feel a bit too dirty - all that implied lesbian love and all that. So, here's a link naughty peps, knock yourselves out.

The Obsidian Battle-Axe pretty much counts as a generic Xena-verse weapon. Too bad it isn't as stupid-broken as that returning flying chakram of doom that Xena actually uses.

The Keldon Marauders that show up in some lists obviously count as Xena's flunkies, so amazingly they're still in theme. The random assortment of burn/pump spells that make their way into deck lists can be explained away by counting them as funky 90s TV special effects unique to New Zealand, so all the non-permanents are still in theme.

As for the non-elf/warriors cards that show up in deck lists so far, most of them still fall into theme. Both the Chameleon Colossus and the Taurean Mauler fit well in the Xena-verse as that particular planar existence isn't short on shapeshifting titans and magical bulls. The same could be said for the much hyped Countryside Crusher.

Basically, as competitive as the list gets, as long as Radha's still there, the deck is still essentially a souped up Vorthosian theme deck that can kick ass and take names. Funny, no?

All of that aside though, what I love most about the deck as it shows up on several MtG related forums so far is the odd choice for some to include this card:

In the right build the Elvish Handservant is only slightly slower than a 2/2 for 1 mana. For Vorthosian purposes, he counts as the bitch-slave of the warrior ladies. Going with the theme, in the Xena verse he'd probably be this guy...

...and everyone knows how surprisingly useful he was during some of the warrior princess' misadventures.